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Witnessing the Chaos, Embracing the Calm

 

Today has been another whirlwind. The pressure of work is intense, and the house feels like a never-ending mess. No matter how much I clean, my little daughter somehow manages to scatter everything again—twice as much. These challenges will pass, I know. But amidst it all, I also see my daughter growing up, her innocent mischief unfolding every day.

I remind myself that maybe I should just let her be. Let her play, let her create her world. And as for the mess, I try to sort it calmly, as much as I can. If it gets done, great. If not, that’s okay too.

Today, I spoke to myself. I witnessed myself—truly witnessed. I’ve been practicing the state of "Sakshi Bhav"—the observer’s mindset. I stayed with it, gently, throughout the day. My meditation today may have lasted only two or three minutes, but it happened.

Interestingly, I’ve noticed that moments of meditation often arise spontaneously—especially when I’m feeding my daughter. At that time, I always have two options:

I could pause, sit quietly and meditate, stopping what I’m doing, or

I could continue feeding her and simply observe the state of awareness arise.


I choose the latter. I prefer to stay with what is—feeding my child while staying present with whatever consciousness emerges in the moment.

I am a mother, and I don’t want to fall into the guilt that spirituality made me escape my responsibilities. Bringing my child into this world was my decision, and raising her well is my duty.

More than anything, I want to weave mindfulness into my daily life. I hope that when my daughter grows up, I’ll be able to gently introduce her to these practices. I know she can’t eliminate stress completely—none of us can in today’s world. But maybe, through these small teachings, she’ll learn to manage it better.

To teach her, I need to have clarity—not just in thought, but in experience. I need to have real answers, rooted in how I’ve dealt with my own struggles using awareness and meditation.

Today, I felt the power of sound—the gentle, soothing background hum of life—and I found peace in it.

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